Don't Call It a Comeback; CoTTBMMTTRS Vol. 1

I understand we've lost a lot of our faithful readers by this point and to be honest, it's completely understandable. Let's evaluate the brief history of Allantoeidēs. We started with great optimism and enthusiasm. It was a fresh beginning, we were brimming with wit and humor, and enough inspiration to drop little nuggets of personality at a fantastic pace. From November 29th to December 19th, we managed to write 15 unique posts. Then winter break hit us. The busy holiday season consumed us and we went dormant for the whole break. We never got back on track after that putting out a paltry 9 posts since, half of them being John apologizing for not writing in a while and one lame very, very forgettable human trafficking joke that John botched completely. We could just let it go at this point and I doubt anyone would care but we're making one last ditch attempt to save it. I promise you more posts (4 per week guaranteed) and less John-joke-fails (no guarantees there). We will earn your trust back.

With that out of the way, let me give you the first installment of the Compilation of Things That Bother Me More Than They Really Should. Or CoTTBMMTTRS for short.

1. RAS syndrome. RAS stands for Redundant Acronym Syndrome and you've probably been guilty of at least one of the acronym errors that fall under RAS. How many times have you heard or said PIN number or ATM machine? Well, if you think about it, PIN number means Personal Identification Number number and ATM machine means Automated Teller Machine machine. These acronyms include the word you are adding after it; they got it under control. Assume that your listener knows the definitions of common acronyms such as PIN, ATM, or HIV and don't add the needless word. It's like saying, "I drive a SUV vehicle." I've made these errors at some point in my life I'm sure but it's definitely something I try to avoid now.
2. Unnecessary/excessive capitalization of internet acronyms. Capitalization of acronyms is usually the norm but the internet is the exception. Whenever anything is capitalized on the internet, that is the equivalent of yelling it. Honestly, I lose brain cells every time someone LOLs or ROTFLMAOMGs at me when I ask them what they had for breakfast. This is how such conversations go (screen names have been altered to ensure anonymity):
   

   seventwentytwo89: hey
   seventwentytwo89: did you im me earlier? I was taking a shower.
   SupASaIyIn4125: LOL
   SupASaIyIn4125: yeah
   seventwentytwo89: what's up?
   SupASaIyIn4125: nothin much
   SupASaIyIn4125: LOL
   SupASaIyIn4125: wanna go grab food later?
   SupASaIyIn4125: LOL
   seventwentytwo89 has gone offline.

   A simple lol will suffice most times. To be really honest about it, most times people should be using lqtm (laugh quietly to myself) if they want to be completely accurate because how often do you really "laugh out loud" (much less "roll on the floor laughing")? I don't expect that much out of you but just don't LOL at me every other line.
3. Doing dishes. And laundry. There is nothing funny or interesting to say about this because dishes and laundry are never funny nor interesting.
4. The whole concept of Superman. It's been addressed by greater minds than me in more eloquent words but it bothers me nonetheless. First, he's either overly strong to the point where it's not really intriguing (in presence of Earth sun but not in presence of Kryptonite) or overly weak to the point where it's not really intriguing (in presence of Kryptonite). So in short, he is rarely intriguing. This leads to half of his major battles happening like this: Supes starts out kicking villain's ass, villain reveals his stash of Kryptonite (surprise!), Supes gets so weakened that he is getting beat by mediocre punches and kicks, Supes/Lois Lane/other ally knocks the Kryptonite into a lead vase or far away enough from Superman for him to regain the upper hand and kick villain's ass for good. Secondly, this guy Clark Kent looks exactly like Superman minus the tights, glasses, and little hair twist and everyone is fooled? Never mind the fact that they're never seen together, they are both tall and ridiculously barrel-chested. I've tried to create an alter-ego with glasses and hair gel and it doesn't work even in a school full of Asians. Everyone who knows Clark Kent and has seen Superman should be able to make that connection barring legal blindness.
5. Plot holes in Heroes. Like the Irish girl that Peter Petrelli was boning in Season 2. That got stuck in the future and Peter doesn't really seem to remember/care. I'm precipitously [great word] close to cutting my losses and dropping the show from the list of things I care about for a show that deserves it like The Wire or shows I've heard good things about like Californication, Dollhouse, and How I Met Your Mother.

Until the next time...

April Fool's Day

Something to think about....

As I was planning nefarious schemes today to enact on people, it became clear to me the amount of commitment, the amount of planning required was enormous. It was almost unbearable and the satisfaction you would get of lying to someone's face and getting away with it, was drained by the constant need of awareness to exactly what your next move was.

Since when did april fool's day get so complicated? As a child a simple fart on you, whoopee cushion you, gunk in the hair; All these things could have sufficed as a prank but now that we've grown everything is so psychological. How can we fuck with your head the most in this day and make your believe it is our goal more than how can we humiliate you in a small funny way. What does that say about us as a rising generation of adults? 

Just some food for thought. 

Movie Weekend

And so now it's around that time of year when all the good movies have already come out or are planning to come out at a time so far off that we aren't actually waiting eagerly for their release. And so Hollywood bombards us with loads of crap to keep us going to the theaters just because we haven't seen a movie in a while.
In fact I actually heard this conversation yesterday.

James: hey Jone what are you doing this weekend.
Jone: I don't know I'm thinking about going to eat at "_____________"(I'm taking offers from restaurants or small places of food consumption to fill this empty line. Cheap advertisements start here! contact me at jjangshift8@gmail.com or leave a comment with your phone number)
James: Want to go see a movie? We haven't seen one in a while.
Jone: That sounds like a great idea. What should we watch?
James: I don't know why don't we go check omegapsoa.blogspot.com? They usually have some good information about things that their readers need.

And HOW RIGHT JAMES WAS! After sifting through the crap that was put out, I did find a few gems here and there. Here are the top 3 movies that I would recommend going to see this week.
NOTE TO READER: I have not actually seen any of these movies. Ratings may change later this week.
1. Monsters vs. Aliens 3-d
First of all I want to give a shout out to the creators of AVP. Here is a better version of all the movies you have ever created. I actually haven't seen any of them but an animated movie about a girl who grows enormously after being "clobbered" by space goo and is eventually named "Ginormica" is a tough concept for any movie to beat. Many a time when I see movies such as these come out where it's just ridiculous idea after another meshed together into one ginormic (failed pun attempt) film, I feel like it's a project that the team here at omegapsoa could've come up with. Ever since I've seen Kung Fu Panda, The Incredibles, Finding Nemo and even Shark Tale, my faith in the entertainment value of animated films has sky rocketed. Go watch this with anyone and I guarantee you'll have a good time.

2. Fast and Furious
First of all, the originality of all the titles of this series amazes me. First we had "The Fast and The Furious". Then we had "2 Fast 2 Furious", "The Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift". And now we have "Fast and Furious". Who comes up with these titles?! We may never know, but one thing is clear, this guy is a genius. Perhaps he is the guy responsible for naming all of Jason Statham's movies as well. Jordana Brewster is also something to look forward to as we didn't really get to see her in the first film and judging from the picture to the left, she is clearly looking forward straight into her future as "that chick from those movies where the cars drove fast and stuff man!" However, even with all these great things to look forward to, I think the one thing the movie has going for it is its nostalgic value. I wouldn't be surprised to see lines and lines of people starting to street race again because of this film just like they did 8 years ago when the first one came out. truly a film worthy of social revolution.

3. knOwing
First of all, Nicolas Cage has the knack of making the "most ridiculous movie plots ever" believable. National treasure one AND two anyone? But I do love the actor of "face off" "con air" and "the family man" and I believe in his ability to make any movie entertaining. This movie is about a man who discovers a list of numbers and immediately associates them with a chronological list of all the world disasters to happen. Clearly the same guy from national treasure has jumped into "knowing". I mean how smart is this guy. Had i seen that number full of papers I would'nt have come close to doing anything with it. Maybe use it as a sandwhich wrapper. Even that would be outlasting its purpose. Either way I'm convinced it'll be entertaining at the very least. I also have to support the man who is currently boning one of my people around the same age as me. Yes I am willing to go there to make this post a bit more entertaining. Good going nick!
Originally I planned on doing a top 5 but I got lazy so I made it a top 3. I would recommend "I love you, man" for those already dating a girl and "The Haunting in Connecticut" for those who want to be dating the girl they are bringing. But if you are afraid of scary movies then you should probably bring a pair of "tinted glasses" that are actually just regular sunglasses and flex the entire movie to bring about that false sense of security to the girl you are accompanying.

i know

I know I know youre probably thinking no not this again. I can't deal with your false promises again! But then again, promises over the internet shouldn't be taken seriously anyway. That's how people lose money. Anyway, me and Dustin have decided to resuscitate the blog even though it had a DNR form lying on it. We promise 4 entries a week every week for a month. And from then on we'll make another oath to you the people as promises are not enough anymore. Look forward to it.

Hello again.

hello everyone. I will not lie I am guilty as charged. I have been hiding away in a land not so far away from you all to escape the scrutiny and expectation that comes with being a writer. I was bombed out though and so here I am. ohh herro!

Today I was sitting in burger king and reminiscing about better times when I remembered that BK used to sell tacos. I actually called a few people to see if I could get any confirmation of this fact, and the responses I got ranged from "you're a lunatic" to "you're stupid". And so with not much encouragement and a heavy heart I began to wonder if perhaps the burger king taco vision that I had was nothing but a falsity.




But lo and behold....
And so I once again realized that my memory for great and awesome things would never fail me ever. And for those who doubt me I tell you that I am not to be doubted!




And so I write this eulogy to the burger king taco.
You were so good my friend. I am sad to see that you have now gone where I can no longer consume you. Rest in Peace until next time.
Maybe Taco Bell is going to come out with burgers! And pizza hut with chicken nuggets?!?! And McDonalds with Pizza? I mean dominoes has already started making baked subs. What is going to happen next?!?!
I can only dream friends. Dream of the great creations that will come out that are not that original in themselves, but "with a glass eye" (dunno if thats a legitimate expression", they are the most original things to have happened in fast food history!

Phenomena

So I was looking up recent phenomena and all of them are kind of dumb. There was one about a woman who heard voices and smelled dog poop. http://en.allexperts.com/q/Paranormal-Phenomena-3278/Recent-Phenomenon.htm. And so I decided that it was a stupid topic to talk about anyway. Well what really happened was I got caught up playing WoW and so I didn't really do all of my research. Sorry guys, it won't happen again. 

I realize that I'm better at planning to do things than actually doing them. This is pretty evident from how I love writing entries about what I'll write about, but when I'm fulfilling that promise I find it such a burden. But for you guys, anything to make up for our lost time together. 

Also there aren't really many jokes to crack about phenomena. Theyre just crazy ass shit that happen in our everyday lives. Sometimes they are interesting such as U.F.Os and Bigfoot, sometimes they are scary like people disappearing, or people who just know where you are. Btw I've met one of those people who can just pinpoint locations and believe me, it is pretty mindboggling.
As I was trying to recall what it is that led me to talk about this, or even want to talk about this, I couldn't remember exactly what my train of thought was but I do know that I went head first into it without a plan. WAIT A SECOND! JUST FOUNND SOME CRAZY ASS SHIT!

It is called the 100th monkey phenomenon. Let me lay it out for you. So there are 99 monkeys on an island. One monkey learns that washing his piece of sweet potato in the river makes it less disease oriented and makes for a longer life. He then teaches monkey number 2 how to wash the sweet potatos in order to help his buddy monkey number 2 also live a healthier life. Soon after, the entire island of 99 monkeys get taught by each other to wash their potatos for the sake of good public health. However, a human scientist comes and says "Hey man. There's 99 monkeys. Let's just drop 1 in to make an even 100". And So the 100th Monkey is added to the peaceful colony of 99 monkeys. The monkeys soon befriend him and teach him the way of their island. For this is an island with good hygeine! And so he learns how to clean sweet potatoes as well effectively making him part of this monkey community. As soon as he does this however, monkeys on different islands all over the world begin to start washing their sweet potatos and this sweet potato washing trend, becomes a world monkey movement, all because of that one extra monkey.

"Watson alleged that the scientists were "reluctant to publish [the whole story] for fear of ridicule." He wrote that he had "to gather the rest of the story from personal anecdotes and bits of folklore among primate researchers, because most of them are still not quite sure what happened." (Taken from whowever this Watson is. It's a quote from somewhere I give credit where credits do I do not take any credit for this).
Hell if I said something like that too I would be all afraid to publish my thoughts. Hell that's like saying that The Knicks are good, or that  Warren's straight or even the forbidden I actually did your mother, mother joke. Either way, it's ridiculous and things like this happening makes me feel that the world I'm living in is a huge farce. And I love it. 

Phenomenons. What a wonderful world.
-The Postmaster

Movies describe life

First of all I wanted to commend encyetoutou for his commitment to this blog. Love you man. Even when I give up you still are there commenting diligently. Let's all give him a hand clap in our heart.
Second order of business. It's been brought to my attention that I need an alias. And so from now on I will refer to myself as the "postmaster". Because I always deliver. YES! That and its a bad pun involving me being a deliverer as well as a master of posting. Suits me perfectly.

Third order of business. It has also been brought to my attention that I am lazy and full of false promises so I offer you today the first legitimate post of the year from me.
I realize that writing in a blog, it's hard to come up with content all the time. When the muse is upon me, I am not near a computer, when I'm attempting to write a blog the muse leaves. And so I decided that from now on I'm going to come up with a battle plan for what's going to be coming every week. So feel free to comment on what else you'd like me to write about but so far it looks like this week is going to break down into these subjects.


Tomorrow, we'll be talking about recent paranormal phenomenon happening in the world today along with look alikes and other random stuff. Be excited to hear about the craziest shit happening in the world and what I think about it. And believe me. It's not gonna be good for the phenomenons. Either that or I'm personally gonna be blown away. Highly doubt it though.




The day after tommorow we'll be talking about, "the day after tommorow". Or the global weather crisis. I know I know it's been talked about way too much, but with the weather getting so dam freaky, I believe its an issue that must be dealt with and dealt with quickly. The more people think about it, the greater the chances are that it won't happen, or it'll happen after we're dead. Which I'd be completely okay with.
Edit: Just after I wrote this post it started snowing. Phenomenon?!?! Involving John?



And we'll end the week talking about human trafficking. I actually recently saw Taken and was really impressed with it. It makes me almost want to join the government and almost want to have a daughter taken away so I can do that shit too. BUT. I don't want this so don't hold this against me! And if you want to take my daughter away, I don't got one you human trafficker! So fuck you! haha. But seriously. Human trafficking is a serious issue and deserves a serious opinion and a serious view on it. And because I'm such a serious guy with a serious view of life, I'll seriously be talking about this serious issue... Seriously.

I would blog on Sunday but it's the sabbath so I'm not allowed to. Sorry dudes. But I do encourage all of you to comment on Sunday. I may be commenting on myself as well. So that's the future look for this week, Maybe dustin'll write a little something. Maybe warren will. Maybe ken will. And if you want to, email me at jjangshift8@gmail.com and I'll let you know if you can. If it sucks I'll tell you how terrible it is and you can try harder next time.

Thanks guys!

-The Postmaster

number 44.

The number 44 has a new line to add to its resume as the most recognized or used number in our generation. President-elect Obama has been inaugurated to become the 44th president of the united states. I imagine all the number 44 enthusiasts are jumping for joy as they finally have something to talk about other than the code for international calls to the united kingdom, vicks formula 44, or for the women in the group, the number of the french department Loire-Atlantique. And for those dieing to talk about politics, rather than exlaim again that the number of days between Clinton and W's birthdays is forty four, they can talk about what the fourty fourth president is doing right now.

As our nation goes on towards its maiden voyage with mostly black president, there's a lot of things to consider. Now I'm not a very politically correct guy, nor am I knowledgeable in the field but there is one fact of life that I do know. Every maiden voyage either ends up greatly successful, such as the discovery of America, or a great fail, going to transporter 3 on its opening day. Whatever does happen though, we all hope for the best and Mr. Obama congratulations and we wish you good luck.
BTW our new layout is meant to make this blog look more calming, professional also has a greek theme and a presidential theme if you can notice at the top of every entry there is a little oval office. so comment on that.

"What's your name, what's your sign, damn you got me repeating lines"

Edit: Site redesign. Enjoy.

I know this blog kind of has a lot to make up for the long hiatus we all took from updating. I'm pleased to say that starting this week, you will get around 5-7 entries a week consistently so don't give up on John yet.

Anyway, I was thinking of what to write about. I pondered for a while and realized that I really like lists and more specifically, rankings. So why not doing a ranking for you good folks? The OCD side of me really likes to sort things out according to a way that makes sense. I constantly rank things in my mind, whether it's point guards or places I like to eat. I want to readily be able to say, so-and-so is better than so-and-so. So today I'm unveiling my first of hopefully many rankings, on something I've seen in the newspaper many times on long commutes; horoscopes and more specifically the Zodiac signs.

Zodiac Power Rankings
[Notable persons are generally in a best to worst order. Coolest to lamest, most desirable to least desirable, most accomplished to most failed, etc.]

12. Cancer (The Crab)

There really is no disputing that Cancer is the worst Zodiac sign. The most commonly attributed meaning to the word is a deadly disease that kills millions a year. Whenever someone asks for my sign so they could check it in the newspaper I have to say, "I'm a Cancer." Honestly, they should've named the medical term something else because I'm pretty sure the Greek myth of Cancer the Crab and the constellation got here first. Don't just try to share the word if the medical term is gonna stand for something as deadly as cancer. To top it off, the animal associated with Cancer is a predictably a crab. At first glance, crabs seem relatively dangerous; those claws seem like suitable offensive weapons. But really, crabs are usually too small to be a threat and they can't jump or fly to claw out your eyes. Crabs are generally only dangerous to bare feet and promiscuously active penises.

Notable Cancers: Derek Jeter, Petra Nemcova, Kristen Bell, Josh Hartnett, Dalai Lama, Dustin Kim, Tom Cruise, George W. Bush, Jessica Simpson, Lindsay Lohan, prostate, 50 Cent

11. Capricorn (The Sea-Goat)

This is a Sea-Goat: 

...enough said. But if you want me to say more, goats were never very cool to begin with; combining a goat with a huge fish certainly isn't the way to make them any cooler. Try sunglasses, a convertible, and a pack of slickly branded cigarettes next time. Duh.

Notable Capricorns: Tiger Woods, Muhammed Ali, Denzel Washington, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Kate Bosworth, Zooey Deschanel, Orlando Bloom, Heather Choe, Jude Law, Warren Li, Ricky Martin, Andrew Chu, Jared Leto

10. Aquarius (The Water Carrier)

"According to the Greek mythology, Aquarius was 'cup-bearer to the Gods' (Ganymede). Ganymede was the son of Tros, king of Troy. While tending his father's flocks on Mount Ida, Ganymede was spotted by Zeus. The king of gods became enamored of the boy and flew down to the mountain in the form of a large bird, whisking Ganymede away to the heavens. Ever since, the boy has served as the cupbearer of the Greek gods." He's to be played by Adam Sandler if the film adaptation gets picked up by a studio.

Notable Aquarians: Michael Jordan, Justin Timberlake, Doutzen Kroes, Elizabeth Banks, Phil Collins, Jennifer Aniston, Mischa Barton, Chris Rock, Judy Blume, Ken Jin, Joey Fatone, Nick Carter, Paris Hilton, Sarah Palin

9. Pisces (The Fishes)

Pisces gets points immediately taken off for looking like a typo of 'pieces'. Other than that, Pisces doesn't really stand out. Goldfish crackers are delicious if you get the right flavor so it gets the slight edge over Waterboy and the Pokemon-inspired Goatfish. I also kinda like the way it's pronounced.

Notables Pisces: Ellen Page,  Shaquille O'Neal, Jessica Biel, Eva Longoria, Rihanna, Steve Jobs, Bruce Willis, Queen Latifah

8. Libra (The Scales)

I may have Libra too high considering that they're representative of an inanimate object. But the notable Libras are generally pretty awesome with a very low concentration of douche so I gave them a slight boost in the rankings. But it's safe to say, if all the Zodiac symbols got into a huge fight, the Scales would be getting humped by the Sea-Goat.

Notable Libras: Usher, Will Smith, Rachel McAdams, Aimee Teegarden, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Matt Damon, T.I., Hilary Duff, Yo-Yo Ma

7. Virgo (The Virgin)

I watched The 40 Year Old Virgin the other day and realized that Steve Carrell plays the same character in every movie. It's not easy to get to a point in your craft where you're so good at one aspect of it that you can make your living off of that. Steve Carrell may never be able to play a wide variety of roles but his delivery of what he does right now is so on point, it doesn't really matter. He's the Jason Kapono of acting. Back on the real topic though, if you wikipedia Virgo and check out the picture they have for the entry, you can tell why she's a virgin. Snap.

Notable Virgos: Cassie, Rachel Bilson, Cameron Diaz, Beyonce Knowles, Ludacris, Keanu Reeves, Michael Jackson, Macaulay Culkin, Ricki Lake, Jimmy Fallon

6. Taurus (The Bull)

Other than being the name of a fairly successful Ford automobile model, Taurus also happens to be the 6th ranked Zodiac sign. Taurus reminded how I never caught a Tauros in the Safari Zone, knocking it down from 5th to 6th. The bull is always a solid choice for an animal mascot though so I couldn't drop it far. 

Notable Tauruses: Amber Heard, Jessica Alba, Chris Brown, George Clooney, Stevie Wonder, Bono, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino

5. Gemini (The Twins)

It's kinda weird how the Olsen twins, probably the most famous twins of the last century happen to be Geminis. Imagine if everyone born in this time period were twins because of some astrological phenomenon. We could have two Natalie Portmans, Adriana Limas, and Morgan Freemans in the world! Although, Kanye West would probably end up committing fratricide on his twin brother for taking away some of his shine.

Notable Gemini: Natalie Portman, Anna Kournikova, Adriana Lima, Ashley Olsen, Morgan Freeman, Johnny Depp, Heidi Klum, Kanye West, Mark Wahlberg, Venus Williams, Drew Carey, Mary-Kate Olsen

4. Aries (The Ram)

What the hell, there are too many goddamn Zodiac signs. Maybe this was too ambitious of an entry attempt to jump right back into cold turkey. I've stalled like 4 times already. Gotta finish at this point though, I've come too far. Uhhh, I...like...Hermione.

Notable Aries: Emma Watson, Miranda Kerr, Keira Knightley, Amanda Bynes, Paul Rudd, Jackie Chan, Zach Braff, Robert Downey Jr., Sir Elton John, Conan O'Brien, David Letterman, Fergie, Sarah Jessica Parker, Rosie O'Donnell

3. Sagittarius (The Archer)

Could've taken the number two spot in my rankings based on some merits but the name Sagittarius detracted from its overall case. Not only is it difficult to say but it sounds rather non-hetero. (Probably because I could see Warren calling John a Fagittarius in jest.) Regardless, the Archer is probably the coolest symbol among the Zodiac signs. I would take being an archer over a crab everyday of the week. A good diverse mix of notables too.

Notable Sagittariuses: Kristin Kreuk, Vanessa Hudgens, Scarlett Johannson, Jay-Z, Elisha Cuthbert, Shel Silverstein, Christina Aguilera, Katie Holmes, Alyssa Milano, Brad Pitt, Jon Stewart, Samuel L. Jackson, Miley Cyrus, John Lim, Britney Spears

2. Scorpio (The Scorpion)

The coolest sounding name for a Zodiac sign is most likely Scorpio. It just sounds like a comic book villain's name and Marvel thoroughly agrees with me. Pound for pound, the Scorpion is probably the deadliest of all the Zodiac creatures. But at the same time, I feel like if I'm aware of the Scorpion's presence, a swift and accurate kick would take care of the threat. Would definitely kill Cancer the Crab easily. Cancer the Crab is like if you took a scorpion and took away its venomous tail and replaced it with an inability to walk straight.

Notable Scorpios: Leonardo DiCaprio, BoA, Martin Scorsese, Daniel Kang, Megan Lee, Bill Gates, David Schwimmer, Hillary Clinton, Danny DeVito

1. Leo (The Lion)

Too easy. Anyone who has grown up watching the Lion King Everyone not named Scar knows that the lions rule the animal kingdom with a fair, yet just rule, imposing their dominance when necessary to keep the circle of life in check. In the Zodiac kingdom, the Lion would scoff at the competition for the throne. Sea-goats? Fish? Crabs? 

Notable Leos: Charlize Theron, Mila Kunis, Kina Grannis, Evangeline Lilly, Kate Beckinsale, Yvonne Strahovski, Ed Norton, Halle Berry, Hayden Panettiere, Matthew Perry and Matt LeBlanc, Casey Affleck, Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck, Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky, Madonna and Alex Rodriguez

Remind me to only rank things in groups of 5 next time.

Start of 2009 with a BANG! or not?

Hello hello friends, brothers, sisters and all people who follow this blog. We've been having trouble with our writers, mainly a strong sense of idleness as well as a failed muse. However we have located this malfunctioning thought spark and fixed it so we should be seeing an exponential increase in the activity of all writers as well as the readers. Honestly the reader comments are one of my favorite parts of this blog as they provide such great feedback to all of our entries. Thank you readers for your amazing contribution.

That was what our higher ups told me to tell you guys, so once again I apologize for the delay. This is John Lim and I hope you guys have been looking forward to the re launch of this blog. We might actually see a site layout change possibly so be excited for that.
Quick thing I wanted to share with you before I exit today. I was actually eating a french toast this morning when I had a revelation. Now I warn you I may be wrong but I believe that I may be right. And so as I was eating this french toast, I was thinking it would be nice to have a butler cook me my breakfast, wheel me around my house in my chair and other great tasks such as pouring water for me after getting me my cup. And all that thought eventually led me to thoughts about Alfred. I decided I'd also like a butler who gave great pep talks and tales of far far lands. But then I realized a troubling fact. In Batman: The Dark Knight, Commisioner Gordon tells Batman that he could not cover up two dead cops as well as all the other shit Two Face did while he was walking around as if he were the terminator. If those two dead cops refer to the cops that he confronted, only one of them actually died. The cop in the bar gets shot, but the chick latina cop just gets hit the fuck out with the end of a pistol. NO BANG FOR HER. This is in reference to the title of the entry. (haha). And so that led me to believe it was a movie blooper. Please comment on this so I may know if I am wrong or right.
And so it begins again. THE CRAZINESS! Thanks for taking me back ya'll.
P.S.
it's come to my attention that we have 13 followers. that's unlucky. someone invite a friend, pet, relative or somtehing so we can pass that roadblock.